Agreeing Loudly Debuts New Feature that does a Think Piece on latest Trump Supporter Think Piece

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The Villages are America’s largest retirement community, and also one of its most Republican. This week, Politico published the 35,475th think-piece on Trump supporters, joining the New York Times and other outlets on a zealous pursuit of dedicating an op-ed or profile on each one of President Trump’s 62,985,134 supporters. This new Agreeing Loudly feature is a behind the scenes look at the latest think piece.
Evergreen Terrace, America —
Earlier this week we dispatched a field correspondent to get a behind the scenes look at the editorial development of the latest think piece dedicated to Trump/GOP supporters. This is an excerpt of what he/she found. 
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Author Michael Grunwald:
Have you glanced at that long think piece I sent you on Friday afternoon?
Editor:
I did. The advertisers and the other staff members have some concerns.
Grunwald:
Such as?
Editor:
Well…the first draft is something like eighteen thousand words. Most of the direct quotations consist of profanity mixed with racial slurs.
Grunwald:
They’re conveying plain-spoken views of regular voters.
Editor:
I get it. Present the unfiltered truth, ordinary Americans, strong convictions and all that, but advertisers are never going to accept something like this.
Grunwald:
You told me to write about the honest opinions of Trump voters.
Editor:
The clerical staff says that there are seventeen paragraphs in which your interview subjects either admit to or fantasize about committing hate crimes. What the fuck are we supposed to do with that?
Grunwald:
I’m fine with substantial changes. If we have to censor some of the more inappropriate, ultra-nutty stuff, so be it. As long as the overarching theme remains…
Editor:
Also, the risk management attorneys are asking for a separate meeting with you because based on your transcripts, you’re in possession of evidence that relates to dozens of felonies. You know that portion with the retired Marine and his girlfriend, where they brag about carrying pistols to fend off carjackers? Well, they’re wanted in three states for arson and attempted murder. The FBI says that they have a history of firebombing Mexican restaurants.
Grunwald:
So you’re saying that I should rewrite substantial portions?
Editor:
We’ll throw in some meaningless horse shit about demographics and economic anxiety. It’ll be fine.
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A visual representation of our think piece.

That’s all for now folks, take care of yourself out there.